Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Oh Well!

I thought that sleep was returning, but last night I had a freak night where I had to take out the old medication again and this morning was terrible - all groggy from too much meds.

But I'm in process. The Holy Spirit is revealing the condition of my deepest heart, which though it has been hurt in the past, just isn't right yet. The things that God is revealing are so heavy that I feel overwhelmed and feel that until this time of change is over, I need to use medication to cope.

It's as if the Holy Spirit is forcing my heart to total honesty, and bringing out nastiness that is very unpleasant to experience - reactions that I don't want to have but can't help.

It all comes from years of seeking love in "all the wrong places" while not seeing that God is the source, and following after idols. And now the trick is to get the love of God to go in and heal the soul.

But the question is this - have you ever asked this question? Where do I go to get God's love?

4 comments:

Scott Bonnell said...

Sometimes the only place is within. Friends, family, "lovers" can let you down.. and often do.

Gabrielle Eden said...

Thanks, Scott, for trying to help. I'm not looking for man's love, I'm looking for God's love.

Kim and Chris said...

Through prayerful and constant reading of God's Word, the Holy Spirit will envelop you with God's love.

Gabrielle Eden said...

Thank you so much, members of the body of Christ, for talking about that which is in my grasp, that which I have already known about, but need to be reminded about.

See, I've experienced much of God's love at the church in Toronto, and have felt like I need to "go somewhere" to find people who have a grasp of the love of God, which does make a difference - being in a place where people have a grasp, but you always have to go back home, and that's frustrating. How much better to have the very portable Word of God and the Holy Spirit who can give you all you need.