About a month ago, I got a cactus. And a week later, it died. I got really depressed because it was like, Damn, I am less nurturing than a desert.
-- Demetri Martin
When I was in London, I went to buy some chocolates. The cashier was like, “That will be ten pounds.” I’m like, “Rub it in, why don’t you?”
-- Carol Leifer
As long as there is algebra, there will be prayer in school.
-- Larry Miller
from the Reader's Digest
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